Thinking of Birthmothers on Birthdays

 I'm always happy for the kids on their birthdays. They get so excited to turn that next number!  However, I do feel differently when it comes to the boys' birthdays versus Allyson's. With Allyson's special day, I think back to my delivery of her and just how excited I was to finally see and hold her. She was super tiny and perfect in every way. All Eric and I did was sit and stare at her. We were amazed and mesmerized by a 6 lb bundle of joy! All my memories of that day are of pure excitement! 

But with the boys' birthdays, I still get a knot in my stomach. I little piece of me is sad for birthmothers on the other side of the world. I cannot help but think of their birthmoms and wonder just how they are doing, how they are living, how they are coping and thinking of their boys ~ my boys. How are they reliving the day they gave birth to their sons?  If I could actually let them know that the boys are happy, healthy, and loved, I would. I can't imagine a birthmother could really forget the day she delivered a son and then the day she took or left that baby somewhere to be cared for.  The next couple of weeks has to be a difficult time for them as they relive a difficult delivery, a sick baby, and the realization that they could not provide for them properly.  Maybe they even did receive the diagnosis of the boys, and it was too overwhelming for them. 

 Is she wondering if her son is alive? If he was adopted? What life would have been like if she kept him? If he has her nose or Birthfather's chin. (Grant has the cutest little cleft chin and I know he got that trait from some parent. )  My heart goes out to both moms, and I pray that they find a peace in their heart with the decision they made. After all, they chose to give these boys life and then chose to give them a chance at a better life when they gave them up for adoption. What a gift that was to both of them and to us. They make up our family and that is certainly something to cherish!

Kristi  – (April 5, 2011 at 9:58 AM)  

I'm with you on that. I "get it." Totally.

Omi –   – (April 8, 2011 at 6:03 AM)  

That waffle will be coming up to you too soon. Children grow up way too fast, in my opinion.

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