The Letter I Wish I Could Write:

Dear Neighbor, 

Thank you for finally removing your rusty scaffolding from the side of your house after only leaving it there for just a year. How thoughtful of you. I especially love how you decorated the back fence with a tarp. Considering it has been raining (I realize that may seem odd for SPRING), I don't think the tarp is going to dry anytime soon. 

If you would be so kind, could you kindly throw your empty diet coke cans in a trashcan versus leaving them on the lawn because you are too lazy to walk the extra steps after cleaning your car out. I would appreciate it because I am very afraid that my children may hear me call you something I shouldn't every time I see them. And, well, that just wouldn't' be good...not good at all. I'm not really the kind of girl known for saying nasty things. 

Oh, and by the way, I was putting kids in the car the other day while you were outside burping loudly enough that the windows shook. Sadly, I imagine you were probably scratching your belly while belching. Ahh, such a lovely sight in the morning. I would courteously ask that you warn me next time so I can indulge in a second cup of coffee before I have to face such indiscretions. 

Lest you think that I am not compassionate or inconsiderate, please note that we do not live in the ghetto.  Our lovely, small town and neighborhood take delight and gratification in keeping our homes and living spaces tidy. Oh yes, the exception:  my daughter will be cleaning out her "fort" she constructed in the backyard very, very soon. 

Yours truly,
Your neighbor

Omi –   – (April 1, 2011 at 5:03 AM)  

I am the proud fort builder helper...when there was just one plank between two...stones? Not many look so swanky. xoxox

Julie  – (April 3, 2011 at 3:34 PM)  

LOL! You saw the post I made about the barn that our neighbors had built (the one that can be seen from space). Unfortunately, it is so close to the property line; but, it in theory should hide a bunch of their unsightly mess. I just wish they had put a door to hide the large camper too. Instead it is under just a carport style covering. Bummer!

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