If you are blog hopping around the circle of adoption blogs, I'm sure you have come across her. This little girl needs a family and has only till Sunday to find her family. She is listed with our agency Wasatch Int'l who we loved. The agency, I can certainly testify, is great, very caring, treats you like a friend, not a business client, work quickly and efficiently, thorough with dossier checks, and always is there to answer questions.
This little girl was born 3/12/03 (just a month before Grant). She is a healthy little girl with left ear microtia. She is living in an orphanage in China. Did you know this can frequently be surgically corrected? She is certainly a beautiful little girl. One of the blogs trying to help spread the word has the coordinators cell number for seriously interested parents. If this little girl is yours, please contact Wasatch! More pictures of her can be seen at:
Waiting Children Blog
Thank you all for the supportive comments and emails. It is hard to know what the right thing to do is sometimes. Yesterday, Jake woke up before Eric. His first words were, "I love you. Where is my China picture?". Eric wasn't sure where I put it. Jake's first words to me that morning were, "Where is my China picture?". I thought for sure we were going to have a REALLY long day.
The kids have been helping me clean the house and have been doing some extra chores for money. It's their "side job" so to speak. Jake is at the age where helping is fun. I asked him to take the shoes that were on the stairs up to the bedrooms where they belong. Okay, so it took a longer explanation than that to help him understand. He was quietly working for some time when he came down and said, "Okay, MOM, here ya go!". I turned around to see an armfull of shoes that he carried downstairs out of our closets! Guess he thought the stairs were the new place to keep all of our shoes!
I had a "Mommy Refresher Weekend" otherwise known as a girl's weekend. Me and and a friend headed down to the beach. Friends of hers offered us their semi-permanently placed camper which was clean and nice. I was a little nervous as I'm not a camper. Okay, that's putting it mildly. Kazakhstan? Fine. China? Fine. Camping? Not so much. In fact, I made Eric promise that I wouldn't have to camp when we got married. But, this really didn't feel like "camping" so much. Hot water, air conditioning. (we didn't have to do anything with the toilet, thank goodness), separate bedroom and bathroom, and a screened in porch. So we chalked it up to having an experience and went for it.
We ate! We ate! and ATE! I have lived around here for many, many years and never tried a "Fractured Prune" donut. They make them fresh while you are standing there and have all kinds of crazy kinds!
- banana nut bread
- reeses peanut butter cup
- blueberry hill
- black forest
We hit the outlets to shop and the pool and laughed until we had abs.....(okay, we laughed a lot, but I'm still really flabby). It was just one night away from the kids, and I missed them. They did just great, though. Eric said Jake was asking for me a lot today, but did really well. PLUS, he was super excited to see me when I got home. YEAH!!!!
- Do you use Costco, Bj's, Sam's or any other mega store? If so, do you think you save money or just use it for the convenience? I had a membership but did not renew it. Now, I'm rethinking my decision.
- Do you cook about every night? order in? or eat out?
- How many of you make your kids do some type of school work during the summer?
- Favorite recipe or dinner?
- How many of you with children let your kids have ice cream for dinner at least once or twice a year?
- Best decision you've ever made?
- How many of you would let your kids dye their hair a crazy color?
- Favorite book?
- Favorite place you've traveled to or would like to travel to?
Jake keeps his word book in the car and likes to go through the pages and tell me what the pictures are. If he doesn't know the English word, he'll say, "San San not think what this is". The other day he began pointing to pictures and asking, "Mama, we eat that?". He pointed to the chicken, the cow, the pig, the frog, the horse (only in Kazakhstan, son), and the dog (uhh....definite no on that one). He was asking what the hen was called. I told him "hen" which he repeated. He then said "mama, hen has egg". Yes! Then he pretended to pull an egg from his own ---uhhhhh----- behind! He even showed me where the egg pops out on the hen's picture!
Later that same day, he was going to the bathroom and complained of pain where his hernia is. Without getting too graphic, I'll tell you that he hadn't quite gotten his pants back up yet when he told me that baba was going to cut him pointing to his "plumbing"! NO! I said. Evidently he misunderstood Eric when he was explaining that we were going to have the doctor fix his hernia! Either that or Eric has been going to med school on the side!
Last night, I headed over to a friends to babysit her kids. I took Allyson and Grant with me, but kept Jake with my husband as he had been tired and fussy. Jake, that is, not Eric! LOL I told him I'd be back in a little while and that he was going to have fun playing with Daddy.
While babysitting, I called Eric and he told me that Jake had been non stop crying, sucking on his finger, and have a melt down for every little thing. He had stopped by the time we were talking and Eric thought maybe hearing my voice would reassure him. Before I could say, "maybe that's a bad idea", Jake was on the other end of the phone. I asked him how he was doing and all he got out was "okay" before the tears started coming again. I told Eric to break out the big guns (aka a bowl of ice cream) and I'd be home soon.
By the time that I got home, Jake (and Eric) were enjoying a game on the iPAD and he was content and pleasant.
Eric then told me of what Jake said while I was gone. As Jake was sobbing, Eric said something to the effect of "Mama is just gone a little while". Before he had a chance to explain any further, Jake said, "Mama gone. Mama come back.....sometime?". Boy, that will stick a dagger in your heart! He obviously still has some insecurities which is only expected.
I have tried before to explain (and we did again last night) that we will be his parents forever. But then again, Jake doesn't really understand "forever". So I've told him that he doesn't have to change parents again. That he doesn't need new parents anymore. We will always be his parents. No more exchanges. That seemed to be the best way to explain it at this point. Guess we need to keep reinforcing that fact! I never thought I'd ever be telling one of my children that they do not have to change parents anymore. Then again, I never thought I'd say "Don't run with chopsticks in your mouth" either.
On Sunday, I noticed Jake ran up to a nursery worker that isn't his teacher or anything. He showered her with huge hugs, kisses, and held onto her leg. He doesn't even know her that well! From reading a lot about adoption bonding and attachment and taking a bazillion hours of courses over two adoptions, I know this is a behavior that I don't want to see. I've seen it sprout up here and there with Jake. So, even though I feel comfortable with our attachment, it looks like we still have some progress to make and work to do!
We have some very caring, dear, generous, thoughtful friends in our life! Friends of ours asked us if they could throw a welcome home shower for Jake and our family. At first, I told her that this was number three and that I didn't expect anyone to do anything. My friend then told me that she had three babies and had a baby shower for all three and that she felt special for all three. She mentioned that I should feel special too as it doesn't matter how they come! So today, they gave us a shower for Jake complete with friends, balloons, decorations, a Toy Story cake, and presents. I certainly did feel very very special as did Jake. I told him that it wasn't his birthday, but just because our friends are so happy he is here! What a special thing for Jake to feel the love of friends.
He really enjoyed opening presents and little Michael was even kind enough to loan him his Buzz Lightyear dress up costume to play with for awhile! Jake has been loving it. Check this thing out! Way cool with Buzz's wings to fly with AND it talks!
Since Grant still has a hard time getting used to having a little brother, and I knew Jake would be getting attention today, mom took him last night for some fun and then this morning we (again) talked about how he had a welcome home party as did Ally (okay, so she was still in utero!), and now it is Jake's turn. We looked at Grant's welcome home party pictures. Actually, we looked through his whole book. The scrapbook I made for him is quite large and was fun going through it with him again. I think it helped a ton as he did very well just playing with all the other kids. Didn't see any jealousy creeping up today anyway! Plus, he gets to play with his brother's new toys. Not a bad deal at all. We didn't see much of Allyson today as her friends were there. Ten and eleven year old girls sure do have fun hanging out and being silly!
More (and better) pics to come as I didn't take many pictures, but am getting some from a friend.
Thank you Cindy and Mike! You guys are so generous and thoughtful. We appreciate it so very much!!!
I had a conversation in the car with Jake yesterday:
Jake: San San hungry, Mama.
Me: Okay, We'll get something when we get home.
Jake: San San wants apple drink (meaning he wants apples in the blender with ice. weird, I know)
Me: I don't think we'll do that but you can have an apple or a banana.
Jake: Hmmmmm........How 'bout dis, Mommy. Milk and banana.
Okay, so maybe you had to be there, but just picture Jake with the finger going and saying "Hmmmm.... How 'bout dis" with a Chinese accent. Cracks me up.
Other Jakeisms include: "You're not the boss!" "Get off of ME!" "Nanny nanny boo boo!" and "Mama said you no!" "You in BIG TROUBLE" "I'm-a-sorry"
I paid, bagged my groceries, grabbed the receipt and started to walk out. I'm not really a loud, confrontational type. I pushed my cart a few yards away and told the boys to stand there.
Walker right over to mister overly tattooed potty mouth and told him I didn't appreciate the foul language he was putting in my kids' ears! "Oh!", he said, "I'm sorry! Sorry!".
Yeah. And don't let it happen again or I'm putting soap in your mouth!
Allygirl had her first day at soccer camp run by a local college's girls soccer team. Since she got home this afternoon, all she has done is eat and eat and eat and complain of being tired. She did manage to play with her American girl dolls for a little while, but is back to eating again. It just may be a very long week! She is moving up a level in recreational soccer and if you are familiar with it, you'll know the girls are more competitive and skilled as they get older. Allyson is a good soccer player, but sometimes doesn't have that competitive drive like her dad. She must have gotten the lack of competitive drive trait from me. I could care less if I win a game of checkers or whatever it is. I just enjoy the game. Lame, I know. Hopefully this camp will allow her to feel comfortable with the girls on her new team and improve her skills......all the while, allowing her to still enjoy it!
July 10---- Jake has officially been home in the States for three months.
And what a difference 3 months makes. Jake understands almost everything we say now. Sometimes, I'll ask him to do something, and he will understand part of what I ask and need some clarification otherwise. His latest thing to say besides, "What-r-u-doing?" is, "I not think that is .........". He loves to say, "Awesome!" and "Whats-a-that?" He is still really bad with identifying colors. There's an eye doc appt in his future. But he can identify a tractor, school bus, ambulance, fire engine, police car, motorcycle, big mac truck, dump truck, a flat bed truck, and on and on! He is putting complete sentences together with verbs and articles, adjectives and adverbs. He still tells big stories, and he can still "drive anything". He frequently uses his nickname "San San" in place of "I". ( "San San like that!" "San San hurt foot" "San San not tired") If you ask him his name, he will tell you, "San San XXXX". We still go back and forth between Jake and San San at home and probably always will. I don't notice improvements in language daily, but definitely notice improvements weekly. He says "turn it out" for "turn it up" and "turn it out" for "turn it around". I hear "Mama, What's that?" and "What-a-r-those?" a least a hundred times a day. The boy wants to know the English word for everything. Funny thing is, sometimes when I tell him the English word, he says, "Not (car, ice cream, or whatever it is)....." and tells me the Chinese word for the object. He then, of course, acts exasperated at me and corrects my lame attempt at repeating the Chinese word! He gets the word for goggles and crackers mixed up. Trust me, I spent an afternoon looking for "crackers" in the pool all the while wondering how I missed Jake bringing crackers in there! That is, until he found the goggles himself and said, "Here they are!". If you would like to spend 5 minutes with Jake, please click HERE.
He still knows how to work it. When he wants something, he will crawl onto your lap and rub your ears while whispering to you what it is he wants. He can give the most pathetic faces. He is our little prayer warrior. I teased Eric saying, "Boy! Do we know how to convert a Muslim!". Warped sense of humor? Yes. He is the FIRST person to put his little hands together at the table before any morsel of food is devoured. He prays, "Dear Jesus, thank you for my food. Thank you for my family. Amen." Too sweet!
I wish I could show the video of his first bath while we were in China. (A little too much nudity for the internet!) It's when I called Eric in to show him how skinny Jake was. Honestly, it was a bit frightening and scary. I don't think you could picture it until you see it. I showed my mom the video the other day, and she was surprised. It took my breath away. He was 27 lbs when we reached Guangzhou, and by then, he had had a week to gain weight already. Today, he is 36 lbs and counting! NINE pounds in THREE months! He has grown taller, but I'm not sure how many inches he has grown.
I'm still not sure when the best time is to give him pictures of his foster family. I am really torn about that. I'd love to show him now, but really don't want to cause him pain. Shouldn't that be in a manual or something? You know, after you have been home for 92 days, 10 hours, and 23 min., you should show your child his foster parents pictures. Hate it when kids don't come with manuals. It means I might make the wrong decision and scar him for life~
Posting from my iPAD here! Really cool, but not seeing some of the regular blogger things like centering the page and font size, Have to figure that out later. Grant did just fine although he did not sleep! My friend said she stayed up until 12:30 with him and even tried rubbing his head to get him to sleep! She finally went to bed and got up at 3:30 to let her dogs out and found Grant fully dressed with shoes on sitting at the top of the stairs! We went to the water park today and he played all day long. He loves those water slides so much. I know he has to be tired.
It's kind of funny that he actually wanted to go in the first place considering he is such a homebody. My parents took Ally on a big trip to celebrate her 10th birthday last year. When mom asked Grant where he wanted to go for his 10th birthday, he said he wanted to camp out in the backyard.
The boys share a room, and Jake is not used to sleeping by himself so we had Ally sleep in there with him last night. However, Jake could not settle down and kept asking about Grant. He cried over fake boo boos and wanted me to sleep with him. He was still up at 11:30. He finally fell asleep rubbing my ears. Guess the boys are used to having each other.
Posting pics of the waterpark later!
Told you it's a small town!